I Will Always Love You
by oTAKU-sAYURi
Summary: Sakura and Syaoran have been dating..but he never shows his feelings for her..it was a bitter sweet love..that is until now. OneShot


okay everyone..this is my first fiction..so please enjoy..

-HikaruAyumi

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I have a boyfriend who grew up with me. His name is Syaoran. I always thought of him as a friend until last year, when we went to a trip from a club. I found that I fell in love with him. Before that trip was over, I took a step and confessed my love for him. And soon, we became a pair of lovers, but we loved each other in different ways. I always concentrated on him only, but by his side, there were so many other girls. To me, he was the only one, but to him, maybe I was just another girl…

"Syaoran, do you want to go watch a movie?" I asked.  
"I can't"  
"Why? You need to study at home?" I felt disappointment grabbing me.  
"No… I am going to meet a friend…"

He was always like that. He met girls in front of me, like it was nothing. To him, I was just a girlfriend. The word 'love' only came out from my mouth. Since I knew him, I had never heard him say 'I love you' before. To us, there weren't any anniversaries at all. He didn't say anything from the first day and it continued till 100 days…200days… Everyday, before we say goodbye, he would just hand me a bear, everyday, without fail. I don't know why…

Then one day…

"Um, Syaoran, I …"  
"What…don't drag, just say.." he said.  
"I love you."  
" ……you….um, just take this bear and go home." he replied back.  
That was how he ignored my 'three words' and handed me the bear. Then he disappeared, like he was running away. The bears I received from him everyday, filled my room, one by one by one. There were many…  
Then one day came, my 15th birthday. When I got up in the morning, I pictured a party with him, and stranded myself in my room, waiting for his call. But… lunch passed, dinner passed… and soon the sky was dark… he still didn't call. It was already tiring to look at the phone anymore. Then around 2am in the morning, he suddenly called me and woke me from my sleep. He told me to come out of the house. Still, I felt joy and I ran out happily.  
"Syaoran…?"  
"Here…take this…" he simply stated.  
Again, he handed me a little bear.  
"What's this?"  
"I didn't give it to you yesterday, so I am giving it to you now. I'm going home now, bye."  
" Wait, wait! Do you know what today is?"  
"Today? Huh?"  
I felt so sad, I thought he would remember my birthday. He turned around and walked away like nothing had happen.Then I shouted… "Wait…"  
"You have something to say?" he said.  
"Tell me, tell me you love me…"  
"What!" he answered shocked  
"Just..please..Tell me"  
I put my pathetic self behind and clung on to him. But he just said simple cold words and left.  
"I don't want to say…that I love someone so easily, if you are desperate to hear it, then find someone else."  
That was what he said. Then he ran off. My legs felt numb… and I collapsed to the ground. He didn't want to say it easily… How could he…. I felt that… Maybe he is not the right guy for me…  
After that day, I stranded myself at home crying, just crying. He didn't call me, although I was waiting. He just continued handing me a little bear every morning outside my house. That's how those bears piled up in my room… everyday  
After a month, I got myself together and went to school. But what made the pain resurface was that… I saw him on a street… with another girl… He had a smile on his face, one that he never showed me…as he touched the bear… I ran straight back home and looked at the bears in my room, and tears fell… Why did he gave these to me… Those bears are probably picked out by some other girls…In a fit of anger, I threw the bears around. Then suddenly, the phone rang. It was him. He told me to come out to the bus stop outside my house. I tried to calm myself down and walked to the bus stop. I kept reminding myself that I am going to forget him, that… it's going to end. Then he came into my sight, holding a big bear.

"Sakura, I thought you were pissed, you really came?"  
I couldn't help hating him, acting like nothing had happen and Sakuraking around. Soon, he held out the bear as usual…  
I don't need it. "What….why…" he said, confused.  
I grabbed the bear from his hands and threw it on the road.  
"I don't need this bear, I don't need it anymore! I don't want to see a person like you again!"  
I spitted out all the words that were inside me. But unlike other days, his eyes very shaking.  
"I'm sorry" He apologized in a tiny voice. He then walked over to the road to pick up the bear…  
"You stupid! Why are you picking up the bear! Just throw it away!"

But he ignored me and just went to pick the bear. Then…

Honk Honk  
With a loud honk, a big truck was heading towards him.  
"Syaoran! Move! Move away!" I shouted… But he didn't hear me, he squatted down and picked up the bear.  
"Syaoran, move!" HONK! "crash!" That sound, so terrifying,the truch slamming into him...glass shattering.  
That's how he went away from me,left me..forever. That's how he went away without even opening his eyes to say one word to me.  
After that day, I had to go through everyday with guiltiness and the sadness of losing him… I coudnt stand looking at those bears he had given me..the only things i had left of him..so i hid then away, in my closet,in boxes, everywhere, but i kept that one bear he had, the one he had the day i lost him, i kept that one under my bed. And after spending two months like a crazy person… I took out the bears again.

Those were the only things he left me since the day we started going out. I remembered the days I spent with him and started to count the days… when we were in love…i had recived one each and everyday...

"One…two… three…" That was how… I started to count the bears…  
"Four hundred and eighty four… four hundred and eighty five…" It all ended with 485 bears.  
I then started to cry again, with a bear in my arms. I hugged it tightly, then suddenly…

"I love you, I love you" I dropped the bears,wide-eyed, shocked.

"I….lo..ve…you?" I picked up the bears and pressed its stomach.

"I love you I love you" It can't be! I pressed all the bears' stomach as it piled on the side.  
"I love you"  
"I love you"  
"I love you"  
Those words came out non-stop. I…love you… Why didn't I realize that….That his heart was always by my side, protecting me, loving me. Why didn't I realize that he love me this much… I took out the bear under the bed and pressed it's stomach, that was the last bear, the one that fell on the road. It had his blood stain on it. The voice came out, the on that I was missing so much…

"Sakura…Do you know what today is? We've been loving each other for 486 days.I couldn't say I love you…. Um… since I was too shy… If you forgive me and take this bear, I will say that I love you… everyday… till I die… Sakura… I love you…"

The tears came flowing out of me. Why? Why? I asked god, why do I only know about all this now? He can't be by my side, but he loved me until his last minute…

For that… and for that reason… to me… it became courage… to live a beautiful life….to continue loving him until i also die.

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okay hope you guys liked it

REVEIW PLEASE! D


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